Tuesday, 3 July 2012

Domestic Abuse - #don't cover it up

This isn't something I talk about normally, perhaps I should though.  It's just...difficult. I have experienced domestic violence at the hands of a partner.   Not many people know this about me, only my current partner and a few close friends.  I've never even told my parents.

Many years ago, I had an abusive boyfriend.  He wasn't always abusive, it happened gradually.  He went from being caring and attentive, to a possessive, mean, violent drunk.  I was slapped, hit and verbally abused on many occassions. Sometimes he would break my possessions too. There were worse incidents, like the time he tried to smash a glass in my face.  I wasn't allowed to see friends without his permission, and if I was allowed out he would often follow me and turn up drunk to cause trouble.

I was lucky I suppose,  the violence I suffered was fairly minimal.  I was good at recognising the signs that he was about to lose it, at which point I would often go home (if he let me), as I still lived with my parents. I was lucky to have somewhere to get away from him. There were lots of incidents.  He was always drunk when it happened, and always begged forgiveness.  I was young and niave and went along with it, too scared to leave him. Eventually I worked up the courage to split up with him with the support of my friends.  If it hadn't been for them, I don't know what might have happened.  I honestly believe without help and support it would have continued...I hate to think how it would have ended.

Not everyone is a s lucky as me though.  Many people have nowhere to go, no one to tell, no one to help them.  More often than not, they are too scared to tell someone.  I know I was for a while.

No one should suffer in silence.  No one should have to be hurt, alone and scared.

Refuge can help. Refuge offer a wide range of services to women and children facing domestic violence.  These include:

  • A National Domestic Violence Helpline
  • A network of refuges across the country
  • Outreach services 
  • Independent Legal Advocacy
  • Culturally specific services  

What can we do to help?

Refuge have launched a thought provoking campaign to raise awareness and encourage women to reach out to get help and support. This is the campaign video, please watch it.

There are many things you can do to help this campaign;
  • Share the video on social networks to raise awareness
  • Sign the PETITION for more life saving domestic violence services
  • Visit 1 in 4 women
  • Visit the Refuge website
  • Donate to Refuge by texting LUKE05 £2 to 70070

1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence in their lifetime.   It is time to stop it.     Please.     Don't cover it up.  Thank you for reading.     


gina caro said...

A very brave post, thank you for sharing x

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